If you haven’t seen the papers, our family was in the Straits Times page 12, under the headline ‘Hitting Jackpot with Triplets’. Our actual interview was 2-hours long and the questions by the journalist were related to our life with triplets and how we coped without extra help. But when you read the papers, you find practically no information that related to our story which if you ask me is a positive, uplifting story. Instead the coverage was a negative one: it emphasised how triplet pregnancies declined when laws came into place regarding embryo implantation, the complications of triplet pregnancies, and where we were discussed it was about how we were horrified, fearful, and financially worried. They also called me Madam, what ever happened to using the neutral Ms.; and they relegated Ming Da’s co-parenting duties to just as a “helper”. Our complex and unique story was simply an entry-way to discussing IVF pregnancies that resulted in triplets, and if you don’t already know from my blog, is that we conceived our triplets naturally.
To be fair to Theresa who interviewed us and wrote the article, she had a longer story to tell and maybe the story would have been more uplifting if not for the brutal summarised editing to her article to fit a story about IVF. Our article also came out at a time when Singapore is preparing for elections and so our story was cut to make more space for election coverage.
What I would have liked to see in an ideal world where there were no elections and we had more space to tell our story is:
- A medical explanations why I conceived naturally: people have the right to know there are possible scientific explanations other than IVF that can result in high order multiples.
- The journalist interpretation about our response and worries about our triplet pregnancy was accurate, so I wouldn’t change that.
- I would also discuss how we as a two-parent team buckled down and went to work to raise our triplets, no matter how difficult it was and overtime as we overcame our steep learning curve, things got easier for us.
- And on top of raising our children, my husband worked full-time and I am writing my dissertation late at night.
The takeaway message being how when daddies are active co-parents, raising four kids or more is possible. I did dwell very heavily in the interview how my husband was sometimes the only parent, especially in the first two months when I was recovering from the C-section.
But that’s just how I see our family.
Although I was disappointed over the article, I’m happy we got a free family photograph out of it and in the accompanying article on twins which featured my friends, they mentioned our Facebook support group, SG Parents of Twins and Triplets. Since the article aired, our members have more than doubled and now the group is buzzing with activity and camaraderie.
Maybe in the future they will look for us and do a story about successfully raising triplets or daughters or a big family. If that happens, there better not be an election happening.