2014 to Mar 2016

When One is This Big…

So when you managed to get as far as I have and gotten this gargantuan, there are a few things that usual pregnancies usually do not encounter:

  • The underbelly sits between the thighs, making it impossible to close one’s legs.
  • In fact you have to keep positioning and repositioning your belly to be semi-comfortable.
  • Stretch marks look like abstract artwork.
  • You feel the pressure of the weight on your hips and pelvis regardless of whether you stand, sit or lie down.
  • Your belly needs its very own pillow.
  • Edema is inevitable.
  • Carpal tunnel syndrome is also inevitable.
  • Feeling breathless all the time.
  • Toilet-visits increases to two every hour.
  • You need a stimulant just to get up from bed.  I have been drinking Coke.
  • The first step after getting up from bed is TERRIBLY painful.
  • Knee-length dresses are always in the danger of being lifted by the slightest wind.
  • You are so close to delivering that you start craving so many types of food.
  • You wonder why epidural is not given to you yet?

Last week, I think my husband burst a blood vessel or something when he jabbed me that this week I am having a phobia of being jabbed.  I was supposed to be jabbed yesterday but I requested it to be postponed to today.  Today has come and I really don’t feel like doing it!  Sigh.

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